Current Mood: Confused
Holy heck… *cough* this page needs a blog maid, lol. I actually thought I was the worst of my still active blogging pals, but I was wrong. I discovered someone beat me to blog abandonment, by a full year before my last post.
So here we are, just about a year and a month since my last post. I lost my grandfather a year ago today and my grandmother 2 years ago this past December. Not a day goes by that I don’t miss both of them. I live with a bit of regret… I regret not staying in contact with both of them more often before they passed away. Especially my grandmother, she had dementia and it really went fast once it was diagnosed. I wish I could’ve called her once more before her memory really left her and she didn’t know or remember who we were. I was supposed to fly out for my grandfather’s funeral, but sadly that coincided with an ice storm that took the south a few days to recover from, it was so iced over that it basically shut the majority of the city down (we rarely get snow down here, so ice we definitely aren’t accustomed to). Needless to say, I didn’t get to fly out, every flight I booked would get canceled until finally all flights were canceled and the airport shut down altogether.
Work is… well, it’s alright. I can’t really complain to be perfectly honest. It could definitely be worse and I could be without a job or have a tyrant for a boss. So I’m thankful for the part-time position and the flexibility of the schedule I have. The schedule affords me time with my kids during the week, especially with both kids in an after school program and then Michael with sports. They love and appreciate their mom being there for them should something happen and they really appreciate that I can attend their school ceremonies. Those are special times that I can cherish forever. It’s the little things that count with them, because when we get older those little moments will be remembered as the big moments that mommy wouldn’t have missed for the world.
I’ve decided to take a break from my main social media platform (Facebook), so that I can concentrate more on just getting my thoughts and feelings into words in my own territory (this blog) without the worry that one of my “friends” is going to get butthurt thinking that something I’m writing or that a picture I’m posting is being secretly directed towards them. I’m sure if you (the reader of this here blog) have a Facebook account then you probably have already experienced what I’ve just said in some way or another. I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s most likely some kind of insecurity in that person… whether they know it or not. In either case, I need a break for my own mental well-being and to focus on myself right now and those friends who DO in fact care about how I really am doing, the ones that take the time to text or call me. Thankfully my family back home (in California) isn’t included in these statements, lol. They know me and know what’s up with me or will just call or text.
I wish I could say the relationship with my husband is as perfect as others make theirs out to be. It’s definitely flawed. Currently we’re just talking to each other in passing, apparently me not taking a job that HE wanted me to take is not pleasing him. That’s fine. I can live without the approval of a man. Been there, done that. That’s all I will say on that subject.
Now I get to focus on my health, both mental and physical because I’ve had a few meltdowns in the last few days and my insomnia seems to have returned. Lovely, right? *sigh*
Next post will be more upbeat I hope. I get to prepare for a trip to New York!